«Following the Jewish tradition, a dispenser of schmaltz (liquid chicken fat) is kept on the table to give the vampires heartburn if they get through the garlic defense.»

«Discoveries are often made by not following instructions, by going off the main road, by trying the untried.»

«Do more than is required. What is the distance between someone who achieves their goals consistently and those who spend their lives and careers merely following? The extra mile.»

«A scout troop consists of twelve little kids dressed like schmucks following a big schmuck dressed like a kid.»

«Anytime I am looking to somebody else as my source, I'm coming from scarcity. I am no longer trusting God, or the Universe, for my harvest. It's reasonable for me to have expectations based on what somebody I trust has committed to. And it's natural for me to feel disappointed when that somebody doesn't come through. But when I feel more than disappointment, when I also feel anger, it's because I deviated from my truth. It's because I compromised my truth to get what somebody else promised. Because when I'm really following my truth, I will be at peace with the consequences ? whatever they are. I can accept somebody else's truth, but I must live my own truth. And sometimes that means walking away from a relationship.»

«All the interests of my reason, speculative as well as practical, combine in the three following questions: 1. What can I know? 2. What ought I to do? 3. What may I hope?»

«Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, 'Psst. That's the Secret Service.'»

«God created the law of free will, and God created the law of cause and effect. And he himself will not violate the law. We need to be thinking less in terms of what God did and more in terms of whether or not we are following those laws.»

«And you don?t get the normal perks of a normal job, like people who work in an office; they have other people there, you can flirt, you know? You go, ?Hey! Oh, you?re new here, aren?t you? How are you getting on? Do you want a coffee? I was gonna go get a coffee- I can get you a coffee? You know, I like my coffee like I like my women- in a plastic cup!?Beekeepers can?t do that! 2,000 bees? (buzzing sounds) ?Hello, there, you in the street! You?re new, aren?t you??(scared) ?Huh???Do you want a cup of coffee? It?s no problem! (buzzing continues) No real problem???I don?t want a cup of coffee from you! You?re covered in bees!??I like my women like I like my coffee? covered in bees! Now back off, back off!? (screams)They?re always just behind you? or in front. If beekeepers get together, and go in a sort of general outing, and they?re in a van with a lot of bees following, ?Faster! Faster! (buzzing sounds) Faster! Put your foot down!?(sighs) Yes?»

«God knows people who are paid to have attitudes toward things, professional critics, make me sick; camp following eunuchs of literature. They won't even whore. They're all virtuous and sterile. And how well meaning and high minded. But they're all camp followers.»